my 3 a.m thought.

someone said this to me, "kenapa mesti nak bersusah payah bila bercinta?"
i was dumbfounded. betul, cinta itu mudah. tapi untuk sentiasa menyintai itu perlu usaha.
komunikasi itu penting. even a random topic.

i observed people's action, expression, words, attitude and everything. i can sense when they are not that into me, as what I've been experience before. i am speechless. when people saying that, as if they are meant i am not worth their effort.

and this one question keep lingering in my head, "do i want this guy as my life partner?"
the answer is no. because relationship takes two to tango, gives and takes, happy and sad, peace and fight, calm and windy, summer and winter, bright and dark, north and south. the opposites attract. to be together we need more than a casual hi or easy goodbye.

relationship, in my belief is consistently doing what both of you valued together. like a small talk, a good morning wish, a random night wishes, flirting, keeping up with each other. those are efforts, even it tiny, it still counts as effort.

so which part is simple about love?
as in Quran, the love is interpret as commitment.

its the same as marriage.
you are married, but how can you maintain to be married for lifetime?
it needs effort.

i was lost when im not even begin.
so hidayah, love yourself.
you are more than that.
good thing will happen, have a faith.